*update*

*update- ultrasound today at 4! I'll let you know what they see. I wonder if I can talk them into taking a look between it's legs. I guess it depends on 1. whether or not the baby is O.K 2. If the US tech has had a good or bad day. 3. The baby is cooperative.

I had an appointment to get my hair done today at one. (very therapeutic when you feel cruddy. I am sure you all know what I mean) But Callie called today and said she would come over to my house and do it for me at 10:30 because I am not that far away, and I am not really supposed to go anywhere. I know it is hard for her to bring all of her stuff over here to do my cut and color instead of doing it at the salon where everything is at her fingertips. And I get my hair done that much sooner! Thanks, Callie!(give her a call at Tantrum 833-7700 to get your hair done. She's fab!)

My grandma comes over on Mondays at naptime so I can run errands. She also ends up folding the loads of laundry on the couch that I so lovingly leave her;) Since I don't have to leave to get my hair done, I can't really go anywhere. But the Ginge is coming over anyway to do my laundry. Thanks Mama Ginger!

Boy I am really feeling so much better about things. I am so blessed to have such great friends and family. Thanks guys!

Thank you

Thank You Glitter Graphics



My husband doesn't like me to complain on my blog, but I did anyway. And I wanted to say thanks for all of the support I got. Thank You!

I called my sister Jannalee on Friday morning after I started bleeding Thursday night and she took Brenley for me all morning until naptime. And then my friend Tiffany brought me over dinner and movies Friday night.

Saturday I got an e mail from my scrapbooking friends saying they were sending over dinner from one of my favorite Italian food joints, Vitos. They are having it delivered on Monday. I think they are having it delivered to spare me the further embarrassment of having my messy house seen. My scrapping girls are very good friends. Thanks Nicole.

Saturday night I got a call from my cousin Lori saying she was going to bring me dinner on Sunday. Lori's family and my family used to hang out a lot as kids. They grew up in Southern California, so we mostly got to see them in the summer when we stayed at the beach. We had a blast! But I haven't seen Lori in a good 10-12 years. Her whole family lives in different states, so we haven't gotten a chance to see them. We did get to see my aunt and uncle for a little bit at my dad's funeral a couple of years ago, but for the rest it has been a long time. Lori recently moved to AZ from Colorado, and we are excited to get to see more of their family! Sorry about this heat, Lori! You'll get used to it;)

Dinner was fabulous, even all of my kids ate it. It even included Mississippi mud pie, which is an old family favorite. I don't think I have had it since I was a kid. We used to beg my mom to make it for our birthdays. It was a delicious blast from the past, just like I remembered it. And yes, I did eat the leftovers for breakfast this morning;)

She also has two little girls around Brenley's age, and is picking up Brenley this morning to play. What a blessing. Poor Brenley is so sick of hanging out at home. She likes to try shoving me out of bed and says, "I ready a go mom! get dressed! get dressed!" She will have fun hanging out somewhere other than here.

I also got an anonymous loaf of lemon bread on my porch last night. Yum!

Thanks to the rest of you for all your kind words and well wishes. I appreciate your support!

I am still spotting a little and still can't feel the baby . But I keep waking up in the middle of the night because I have dreamt that I feel it. I am hopeful that that means the little bugger is moving all over the place while I sleep;) I am just going to have to take it easy until my appointment on Wednesday (I have insurance again! woo hoo!)


I will post more interesting things when I find my camera! There are so many things I need to post, but they all involve pictures, and my camera is AWOL. Hopefully it will show up soon!

Rant- Will things ever be normal again?

I think I will take a page out of Julie's book and just plain rant for a minute. I am told that blogs that always sound like life is nothing but rosey are unreal and boring, so here is a dose of my reality-

Warning- TMI

I am cramping and bleeding and haven't been able to feel the baby move in the last few days. I haven't had insurance since May 1st because of changes in life and employment, so I am reluctant to go to Urgent Care or the E.R. At only 16 weeks, if something is wrong there is pretty much nothing they can do about it anyway. All they could do is give me an ultrasound and tell me one way or another. Expensive assurance. My insurance should kick in by Monday, but I am hoping I will feel the darn thing kick before then. It is not very big, so I may not feel it move every day anyway. I am hoping the pain and bleeding is just being caused by a pesky growing cyst on my one remaining ovary, and has nothing to do with the baby. Right now it is quite painful, and kind of stressing me out.

My daughter told me I was horrible and selfish for getting pregnant and I am ruining her life. Two years of her life have been ruined by my pregnancies (Brenley, preeclampsia, this one, cramping and severe nausea) a willing sacrifice to bring another child into this world? Or just another way to ruin my children's lives. Why this little rant? I wasn't able to go to a concert last night, and was unable to go rent a movie tonight for "girl's night in" (tradition we have during Father's and Son's camp out weekend.) I did get a friend to bring over about five movies of theirs that we don't own for the girls to choose from, and promised I would rent a movie on another night that I wasn't so bed ridden. But apparently that wasn't good enough. Not even close. My poor kids are suffering and suffering because I was selfish enough to get pregnant. But it has been so much fun for me!;)

My son called me from school and asked if I could come to his little classroom awards ceremony. As I was hemorrhaging and hadn't heard a word about it until that moment, I felt I better not. So I get to hang up on my crying 7 year old. Mother of the Year.

My friend Tiffany brought me dinner tonight and the house was a flipping disaster. It was so dang embarrassing. Why can't my husband and kids pick up around here when I can't? Maybe they are just used to living in chaos right now. Another check for bad parenting for me.

I haven't really been posting much, because I have been feeling crappier then usual. Here is my first real post in a while. I should be posting about Brenley's swim lessons, Mitchell Mother's Day Brunch, and Kindyl's 3rd grade concert that she got to sing a duet in. I will get to those I promise. Hopefully.


Will things ever go back to normal? Or maybe things were never really normal to begin with....

Happy Mother's Day!

A mother’s nurturing love arouses in children, from their earliest days on earth, an awakening of the memories of love and goodness they experienced in their premortal existence. Because our mothers love us, we learn, or more accurately remember, that God also loves us.


-M. Russell Ballard


Happy Mother's Day to all you mothers!

For All Mothers~~This is for all the mothers who froze their buns off on metal bleachers at soccer games instead of watching from cars, so that when their kids asked, "Did you see my goal?" They could say, "Of course, I wouldn't have missed it for the world," and mean it.This is for all the mothers who have sat up all night with sick children in their arms, wiping up barf laced with Oscar Meyer wieners and cherry Kool-Aid saying, "It's OK honey, Mommy's here."This is for all the mothers of Kosovo who fled in the night and can't find their children. This is for the mothers who gave birth to babies they'll never see and for the mothers who took those babies and gave them homes.For all the mothers who run carpools and make cookies and sew Halloween costumes and for all the mothers who don't.What makes a good mother anyway? Is it patience? Compassion? Broad hips? The ability to nurse a baby, cook dinner, and sew a button on a shirt, all at the same time? Or is it heart? Is it the ache you feel when you watch your son or daughter disappear down the street, walking to school alone for the very first time?The jolt that takes you from sleeping to dread, from bed to crib at 2 a.m. to put your hand on the back of a sleeping baby?Is it the need to flee from wherever you are and hug your child when you hear news of a school shooting, a fire, a car accident, a baby dying?I think so.So this is for all the mothers who sat down with their children and explained all about making babies. And for all the mothers who wanted to but just couldn't.This is for reading "Goodnight, Moon" twice a night for a year. And then reading it again, "Just one more time".This is for all the mothers who mess up. Who yell at their kids in grocery store and swat them in despair and stomp their feet like a tired two year old who wants ice cream before dinner.This is for all the mothers who taught their children to tie their shoelaces before they started to school and for all the mothers who opted for Velcro instead. For all the mothers who bite their lips (sometimes until they bleed) when their 14 year olds dyed their hair green.This is for all the mothers who lock themselves in the bathroom when babies keep crying and won't stop.This is for all mothers who show at work with spit-up in their hair and milkstains on their blouses and diapers in their purse.This is for mothers who teach their sons to cook and their daughters to sink a jump shot.This is for all mothers whose heads turn automatically when a little voice calls "Mom?" in a crowd, even though they know their own offspring are at home or are grown.This is for mothers who put pinwheels and teddy bears on their children's graves.This is for all the mothers whose children have gone astray and who can't find words to reach them.This is for all the mothers who sent their child to school with a stomach ache, assuring that they would be just FINE once they got there, only to get a call from the school nurse an hour later asking them to please pick them up right away.This is for young mothers stumbling through diaper changes and sleep deprivation. And mature mothers learning to let go.For working moms and stay-at-home moms. Single mothers and married mothers.Mothers with money and mothers without.This is for you, so hang in there. The world would be a terrible place without the love of mothers everywhere. You make it a more civil, caring and safe place for the precious children in our world....Author Unknown

Disclaimer- I am a total plagiarist. I copied practically this whole post from my cousin Lori's blog. Both quotes were just perfect, and really summed things up for me. I am struggling with not being a perfect (or even a very good ) mom right now. So both of these quotes were kind of uplifting for me and show how I am feeling.

I am a copy cat. I've done it before and I will probably do it again. So if I read your blog, beware!;)

Awesome picture- contest

What mother, or anyone else for that matter, wouldn't love to have this picture? I am entering a contest to win it given by the custom framing store Matage. The store is owned and run by some good friends of my friend Crystal. They did all of the framing of the photos in the "Reflections of Christ" series. I am sure all of you who were able to see that display were as impressed as I was. Check at the contest at: http://www.matageframing.blogspot.com/

Back from the Beach House

Yes, it was fabulous. The weather was perfect. Love the beach. Wish I took more pictures. Can't wait to go back.

Now I need a vacation from my children. Missed my husband.

Will write more later. Have to unpack.

Cousins

I was reading a post on my little brother's blog the other day, was in his photos looking at wedding pictures, started snooping and came across this picture. I love it. This is a picture of me and Bren, my sisters and two sisters in law, and many of her cousins that are her age. All but one were born within a year of her birth. Count 'em.


Yes, we Proffitts know how to procreate. Rachael has 4 cousins that are her age. She has always loved it. Kindyl kind of came in between rounds of babies but still has 2 cousins that were born only a few months before she was (unfortunately, both are boys. Poor little K) but she has always been able to play with the older girls or take care of the younger ones. Mitchell has 6 cousins his age, including 2 boys. (Boys are scarce in our family, so he really hit the jackpot)



All but two out of the 11 of us live here in Mesa, so our kids get to see each other often. They are really lucky. It is kind of like having built in friends. How lucky are they that every vacation they go on they have tons of friends to play with?

Of course, since so many of them are girls (and so many of us for that matter) there is bound to be some drama every now and then. We try to keep it to a minimum and have our little ways of avoiding it.



So this picture got me thinking about this next baby. It will be pretty lonely! My sister in law Margaret is pregnant and two months ahead of me, so it will have one little friend. But Clark and Margaret are moving to Tucson. And their baby is due in August and mine is due in October. I don't believe in putting your kids in school early, so this means they will probably be in separate grades. We have dealt with this before though, so it may be O.K. But what if it is a girl? (Marg is having another cute boy. Can you say jealous?) .)


I am number 6 in my family. My 5 older siblings are all done having children, so I have no hope for them. I don't think there is much hope for my 5 younger ones either. One is in a looong process of adoption, and two just aren't ready for another baby yet. What can you do?


SO what is the fate of this little baby # 5? Is it going to have only one little cousin to play with who happens to live hours away? At least they will be together for vacations, right? It may have cousins who are only around a year younger. That wouldn't be so bad.

What do you think? Did you grow up with cousins? (We didn't really) Will this baby be O.K without them? Or is it really just no big deal?